Why Keep Coming Back?

As I have continued to spend more time on Japanese and clarinet once again, I've wondered--why not just give it up?  Why do I keep coming back? I scrolled past something that defined grit as a commitment to a long term goal. I am leery of labeling myself gritty, but it made me wonder: perhaps it's the residue of what happens when you give up finding the muse (or whatever) in the immediate future and realize that you probably won’t encounter it for a long time.  You know you'll encounter it someday, if only you keep searching, working, whatever. Perhaps as you orient yourself towards a process, a sense of resignation comes with it: this is it--this is what I do. I think it’s the same feeling when you start working on a concerto: this is going to take a long time--settle in. And, for me, I become more matter-of-fact and less reactive to random troubles, instead seeing them as merely passing issues.  A lot of things, you quit. For a few things, you keep coming back. Why? ​